My Only Memories Of Melbourne Were:

nothing, except the one memory I do have that was amazing...issue #101

ifOnlyi… decided NOT to go, I would not have had the experience of seeing the amounts of Yobbo’s I was surrounded by, which was shocking as well as memorable.

The next leg of my journey began after being dropped off at the Sydney airport by my mate, Baz, who drove me back from Surfers Paradise. 850km driving non-stop, except for the few needed pee stops and gasoline.

It was tough saying goodbye to Baz, someone I had worked with for 5 months; the memories we shared were terrific, and I hoped they wouldn’t fade over time. Baz was my friend & so was his girlfriend. A wonderful man!

I just knew I could never forget the fact that he was sitting, having a beer in a bar, that I just happened to walk into in Surfers Paradise. Boom, there he was, my friend Baz from Sydney - what were the odds? Then I learned that he could take me back to Sydney. No hitchhiking this time!

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If I hadn’t believed in a higher power before this chance meeting, I felt it after walking into my local pub; there he was sitting, waiting for me! LOL.

I have now bought my ticket and I’m on the flight to Melbourne. In a way, I didn’t want to go, but many people had told me to visit while I was there, and I had made a promise to Samantha.

After arriving, all my luggage in hand, I couldn’t find Samantha, and she couldn't see me. Here we go again! After hours, we finally connected. She kept saying she walked past me without knowing it was me. My hair had bleached out from all the ocean swimming and sun all day in Surfers Paradise. I had turned almost blond.

The feeling of seeing her was not what I expected; the lust had gone. On the drive to her place, she shared that she was dating an Aussie Professional Rugby player. OH, perhaps that’s why I felt the way I did, but not really, the spark just wasn’t there, but I still planned to have a great time.

As Samatha was living with the Pro, I had the couch, something I was once again grateful for. I bought the drinks and some food to cover the cost of my stay.

I knew almost nothing about Australian Rugby and even less about cricket; however, while I was there, on February 13, 1983, they were hosting the 2nd and final cup—Australia vs New Zealand. I bought tickets for me and for Samantha’s boyfriend to attend the Cricket final as a thank you for allowing me to stay with the two of them. There was much more to the Cricket than just watching, for me. It was about one word. Yobbo

Yobbo - Urban Dictionary 
“Yobbo is a stereotypical Australian who drinks beer, eats meat pies, and drives old cars. It can also be a nickname for a real Aussie man or a way to insult someone. See different definitions and examples from Urban Dictionary users”.

There were many words used for beer drinkers with massive guts. I never forgot some of these, including "gut full of tinnies" or "beer gut with a koozie". Another phrase is "verandah over the toy shop," which is a more jocular term for a large, protruding belly. They truly take pride in the size of their gut.

These “Yobbos” would sit with their tin cans of beer sitting on their stomach. If you saw four tins, well, they were on their way. If you saw six tins of beer sitting on top of their bellies, they had become professional Yobbos.

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Boy, did I get a kick out of this. For me, sitting next to a Pro Yobbo, weighing in at well over 350 pounds and me weighing in at only 175 pounds back then, I could barely hold one tin, even though I was now a skilled bartender. (LOL). My skillset did nothing this day. I was truly invisible to them all, as skinny as I was. I guess you have to start somewhere.

You could only buy four tins at a time. The beer of choice for them was XXXX, otherwise known as Four-X beer. The X’s represented the strength of the beer. A Yellow can with four red X’s, stronger than usual, and truthfully, I enjoyed the few I had.

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There must have been tens of Thousands of empty tins everywhere, on the ground, in garbage pails, on shelves, and seats. It was a contest among them; them being the Yobbo’s to see how many tins they drank for the day’s cricket.

What a place and environment for me to have experienced during the trip. It was perfect timing. Here, it was a game I had zero understanding of, but as a former lover and player of Baseball, I was told it was a bit like that.

So off we went. We sat on top of a dirt mound in the stadium. Yes, these were tickets I had purchased for us. We had seats, but everyone preferred to sit elsewhere, I guess for comfort. It was a massive game for the country, as Australia had won previously only in the 1980 and 1981 seasons.

The stadium was round, as the photo will show. Holding 100,024 fans. Massively impressive.

The Australian team has won the most World Cup titles since I was there. Six times. They won the ICC Men's ODI World Cup in 1987, 1999, 2003, 2007, 2015, and 2023. I was privileged to have been part of that experience.

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It was now time for me to go back home. By 'home' I mean America. My time in Australia had come to an end, but not a smooth one. I asked Samantha if I could borrow $30 on the way to the airport, as I had run out of money. I would send it back the moment I got home, she said she had none on her.

I knew I treated them well, but I should have considered my personal needs before caring for others. However, that’s the way I lived: always spending on others or buying their friendship. 100% fact! Embarrassing.

Now I have zero money, as I board the flight back to Los Angeles. I knew I needed a taxi home; no one knew I was coming home. What was I to do?

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ifOnlyi…short stories follow my true-life journey. If you've just found me, you can check out my publication and choose a story of interest or start from # 1.