Teenage Stupidity; Driving Drunk, Blacking Out. Divinely Guided Home.
Mom & Dad opened my bedroom door, "OLLIE, you've been drinking?"…Issue #41
…ifOnlyi… hadn’t been ‘three sheets to the wind’ while trying to impress one of my beautiful classmates, I believe I would have been going to the Prom with her. Had I not been so afraid of missing my curfew, I would not have driven home after drinking way too much alcohol.
It all started when my best friend and I bought a handle of Smirnoff Vodka and a large bottle of orange juice (OJ). We were both seventeen and off to a party that night!
We split the 1.75 liters of Vodka. Half went into the orange juice bottle, and the other half went into the Vodka bottle.
John kept the handle, and I drank from the OJ bottle to avoid looking so desperate.
Our friend Bruce’s parents were out of town, so we went to his house for a big school party. Our Saturday night was about to start.
When we arrived, the band was cranking. It was one of the teen groups that enjoyed playing and dreaming of maybe one day becoming something more significant than a house party band.
People were everywhere, the mood was fantastic, and we were starting to get tanked. I have zero idea why we brought Vodka, and to this day, I still have no Idea. Kegs of beer flowed everywhere, and there would have been more than enough. Why were we trying so hard to be different from the others?
Over 200 kids were at this one house party, and Bruce’s house was rocking big time — kids on the street, inside the house, outside by the pool, everywhere.
I had been chatting with many students I knew, and suddenly, I saw the beautiful girl I hoped to date one day. I had spent time talking with her on the phone over many months; she was, in fact, an excellent surfer; it was her true daily passion, and I loved watching surfers, especially the girls.
It’s funny, but we both happen to be in the school finals for the person who could lean against a wall in the sitting position the longest, using only the strength of our legs.
Remember, she was a great surfer, and surfers have strong legs. Together, we beat all the others, vying to do their utmost to win. All the sports stars tried their best to outlast us, not a chance! We held our ground.
Then, it came down to the two of us, and in the end, I am proud to admit I won. However, I didn’t walk right for two days, and I was still shaking after the win.
So, back to the party!
I was hoping to ask this beauty to be my Prom date. I so wanted to be hers, and being so nervous throughout the evening and having such a dry mouth from nerves, I ended up consuming well beyond any legal limit of alcohol.
I was so messed up I couldn't ask her to be my Prom date that night.
My buddy, John, had passed out in a Cactus bed, for real, and was sound asleep. On the other hand, I was walking around, begging anyone and everyone to drive me home.
There were no takers! No one wanted to be involved in driving; there were too many logistics involved to figure out how they would get back to the party.
Ultimately, it came down to me wanting to make my curfew. I had to go all alone and leave John behind. No one could wake him up anyway; he was two sheets to the wind and beyond!
Stupidity was about to start the car. That’s me, Ollie.
I kept thinking, ‘OK, Ollie, it was just shy of five miles and only three turns to my house.’ I could barely walk. I was scared, but I had in my mind not to miss my curfew, or else I would be in big trouble.
OK, buckle up, lights on, windows down, music going, now go! What was I thinking?
All I needed to do was make a left-hand turn onto the main street, Hawthorne Blvd, drive 2 miles down the hill, make a right-hand turn onto Palos Verdes Drive West, and make a left at our house. Easy — or so I thought.
What I still remember, and the last thing I recalled, was making the right turn on PV Dr West, cutting up on the curb, driving over to the sidewalk, and clunking out the other side onto the street again. Then blank!
So next, I would have driven on PV Dr W to our house, and somehow, by the grace of a higher power, I woke up in bed. I had no idea how I got there, no recollection of the last part of my drive, and no idea how the gate was opened or the house alarm turned off. I was home. But was it my home?
The next thing I recall was knocking on the bedroom door. I awoke like lightning had struck me, and then the door opened. “Who’s there?” I asked (it was pitch black), in a massively confused state of mind. I heard voices shouting, “It’s your mother and father, Ollie. Have you been drinking?” “Say what?” I said shakily. “You heard me. Have you been drinking?” “Why no,” I replied, as they kept asking repeatedly.
You would tell us if you had, RIGHT?
Yes, of course, I would. I am 100% sure my words were slurring, and after the amount I drank, I never wanted to leave that bed of mine again.
Did I fool them, or would I find out later that things were much worse than I imagined?
When I finally got around to asking my dream girl to the Prom, she already had that locked up.
Thank you, Mr. Smirnoff.
This time, I was guided home. Next time, I wouldn't be so lucky.
….ifOnlyi…. short stories are published chronologically and follow my life growing up in California from 4 years old. If you’ve just found me, the stories will come together when you start reading from….Issue #1